Good Friday

I never feel like I put enough effort into Good Friday.  My fasting isn't enough, my abstaining from meat isn't enough.  I don't pray enough or reflect enough.I look back over the days of Lent and always think I have failed at it.

I was going to go to Stations of the Cross, but just sent my husband instead.  We were watching our grandson for a few hours and it was his nap time.  I am sure it was a great way to reflect upon these hours of Good Friday.  I attended Holy Thursday services, staying for an hour of Adoration afterwards.  I will go to Good Friday services tonight and Easter Vigil tomorrow night and morning Mass on Sunday.  So, why is it I don't think I do enough or do it right?

It has been an unusually overcast day, with a 20% chance of rain.  I have even seen a drop or two in the pool.  The overcast seems so appropriate for this day. A bit somber.  Yet, because I know that in spite of Good Friday, or because of Good Friday, Sunday is coming.  We as Christians focus so much on the Crucifixion, that sometimes I think we miss the Resurrection.

I love the Gospel stories that lead up to Good Friday.  The Parables that show Jesus teaching, challenging, changing and loving everyone through these days.  Without that love that he shows through his teaching, challenging and changing, would we even be aware that we want to give up more or be more or change more during these days?

Maybe, just maybe, His love makes me enough.  What is more important? To do it right or love him more?  I think each year that I experience Lent, Holy Week and the Resurrection of my heart through the Mass of the Resurrection, I love him more.  Maybe next year, I won't be as concerned about doing it right and I will love more.